Deployments.... While I have NEVER been so thankful and grateful for my husband fighting for this country, it's not easy being apart. We sometimes just pretend that it is for now. That's all we really can do. We look forward to the future, and try not to think about how long we have been apart. That is again, all we can do.
The HARDEST part of the deployment so far:
The Goodbyes.
Layne had no clue what was going on. (That was best, we decided.) He had no clue when he went to bed that night that he wouldn't see his daddy for the next year. No clue that mommy would take on all of Daddy's roles. How do you prepare a 1 year old for that... you just can't. Watching the strongest man that I have ever met having to say "Goodbye" to the most important person in his life... heartbreaking. As much as we wanted to remind ourselves that, "This isn't Goodbye, it's See You Soon." ... it sure felt like Goodbye at that moment.
I posted on a smile and pretended to be strong. Army Strong, right?
DON'T ever tell someone they have to be strong until you have walked in their shoes. It's not about being strong, it's about praying for the strength to just stand. Praying that God allows you to let go, helps you understand that this is all part of his plan, and mostly THANKING God that he gave you someone so amazing that is willing to do all these things for a complete strangers freedom. I am more thankful for this amazing man than anyone else on this Earth can imagine.
Beautiful first post Mel.Although I am married to A Vet, he served before we were married. So no...I have never walked in your shoes. I can only imagine what the goodbyes are like and I am sure you go through the same anxiety each time you speak. In some small way I can relate, my daughter is a first responder in NYC. Each day when she signs in to work might possibly be another 9/11. But I am able to pick up the phone and call her when I need to. It is not that simple for you. You have been doing such a good job filling in for Jordan while he's filling in for all of us. I think this blog will be good for you also. It will allow you to clear your mind from day to day. Each day is a fresh canvas for you to paint a picture on! I think it is very generous of you to share your private thoughts with us, maybe answer a question or 2. Each night and every morning I add Jordan & all the other brave men and women serving to my prayers. I pray for their safety and their strength. I pray that their job gets done so they can come home to their families who are serving back home.I know a lot of people may not see it that way....that military families also serve, they just have the hometown advantage. To do all the jobs at home that you are doing allows Jordan to have a peace of mind that all is well at home. He is not distracted by worries of what is going on at home, he knows you have his back. So once again...Beautiful first post Mel. I look forward to many more!
ReplyDeleteWe are strong Mel, Even When we aren't. Love you! <3
ReplyDeleteI know how hard it is to let someone you know go. Keep praying and counting down the days! And don't you love that your husband loved your son so much? That was one thing that made me love Jim even more~ seeing his love for Marley.
ReplyDeleteSo glad you're blogging!